I’m Writing

I have had a book (or books) living inside of me for as long as I can remember. I’m finally making it a priority to get it out.

Life has recently conspired to make this possible. My coaching business is fruitful and sustainable after several years of growth. I’ve said No to a few big projects that don’t match my goals. And last week, we relocated to Maine where we have total peace and quiet, and views of the ocean from every window. My business remains based in New York City, but for the next few months (at least) my time will primarily be spent here.

At the beginning of the year I was feeling drawn to visit a retreat center without knowing why. I happened upon a workshop titled The Book You Were Born to Write led by Kelly Notaras who recently published a book by the same name. It hooked me immediately. So I’ll be at Kripalu soon to immerse myself in her guidance and surrounded by community coming together to unearth themselves.

Part of the prep for the retreat is to read Kelly’s book, which only two chapters in has already transformed this process for me. She includes many exercises to play with at each step, and as I experiment with them new insights and realizations about who I am and what a book means to me are emerging.

Below is an exercise that Fredrick facilitated for me yesterday. (Kelly recommends working with a partner on some things, and as far as I’m concerned, I have the best partner there is.) He asked me each of the following four questions, I gave stream of consciousness replies, and captured a summary statement that felt right and true. Then (as instructed) he gave no feedback at all (!), said a neutral “Thank you for your honesty,” then moved to the next question. He asked these four questions in four rounds, and together we saw how my answers deepened and changed.

By Round 3 I felt I’d said everything that needed to be said and suggested I could skip Round 4, which Fredrick beautifully ignored, and then asked the questions again. Unsurprisingly, that’s when things really opened up. (Having a scrupulous facilitator and partner is a very special thing, and really makes all the difference.)

The progression was so profound that I just had to share it with you.

I’m excited to finally be carving the path that has been calling me for so long, and I look forward to sharing it with you along the way.
 

By Round

Round 1

Q1. What would you like from writing this book?
I want to be on the other side of having written something long and deep.

Q2. What will having that do for you?
Getting it out will give me an emptiness I’ve never known and always wanted. Emptiness = safety. I’ll feel safe. I’ll have fulfilled my purpose.

Q3. When, where, and with whom would you like it?
Start now and for the next 2 years, in our own home/space, together with Fredrick. Stable and free.

Q4. How will you know when you have it?
I will have energy and want to fully participate in life. And I’ll have no reason to compare myself to anyone else because I will be doing exactly what makes me happy. I’ll be smiling. I will be one with my inner child and with the world. Peaceful. Not ashamed.

Round 2

Q1. What would you like from writing this book?
So I can rest in peace.

Q2. What will having that do for you?
It will allow me to enjoy life.

Q3. When, where, and with whom would you like it?
Now, here, and with Fredrick.

Q4. How will you know when you have it?
I won’t feel unfinished.

Round 3

Q1. What would you like from writing this book?
This book will be a conduit through which I achieve my own version of enlightenment. To meet myself.

Q2. What will having that do for you?
I will love myself the way I deserve to be loved.

Q3. When, where, and with whom would you like it?
Now and forever, here and anywhere, with myself and with Fredrick.

Q4. How will you know when you have it?
I won’t want anything other than exactly what I have.

Round 4

Q1. What would you like from writing this book?
I want to know my deepest truths.

Q2. What will having that do for you?
I’ll no longer be afraid of what I might learn someday. And I’ll always be able to come home to that deepest place inside of me, where I am always safe and I am always free, where there is no pain and only peace, where I am connected to all of existence and all of eternity.

Q3. When, where, and with whom would you like it?
Now and forever, here and everywhere, with and for myself, with and for Fredrick, with and for everyone.

Q4. How will you know when you have it?
When I’m blank.

 

By Question

Q1. What would you like from writing this book?

Round 1
I want to be on the other side of having written something long and deep.

Round 2
So I can rest in peace.

Round 3
This book will be a conduit through which I achieve my own version of enlightenment. To meet myself.

Round 4
I want to know my deepest truths.

Q2. What will having that do for you?

Round 1
Getting it out will give me an emptiness I’ve never known and always wanted. Emptiness = safety. I’ll feel safe. I’ll have fulfilled my purpose.

Round 2
It will allow me to enjoy life.

Round 3
I will love myself the way I deserve to be loved.

Round 4
I’ll no longer be afraid of what I might learn someday. And I’ll always be able to come home to that deepest place inside of me, where I am always safe and I am always free, where there is no pain and only peace, where I am connected to all of existence and all of eternity.

Q3. When, where, and with whom would you like it?

Round 1
Start now and for the next 2 years, in our own home/space, together with Fredrick. Stable and free.

Round 2
Now, here, and with Fredrick.

Round 3
Now and forever, here and anywhere, with myself and with Fredrick.

Round 4
Now and forever, here and everywhere, with and for myself, with and for Fredrick, with and for everyone.

Q4. How will you know when you have it?

Round 1
I will have energy and want to fully participate in life. And I’ll have no reason to compare myself to anyone else because I will be doing exactly what makes me happy. I’ll be smiling. I will be one with my inner child and with the world. Peaceful. Not ashamed.

Round 2
I won’t feel unfinished.

Round 3
I won’t want anything other than exactly what I have.

Round 4
When I’m blank.

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